After reading your letters — let me reply with my sincere hesitation, I am nervous, I might distract you unwittingly.
Whenever you share your stories and confusions, you remind me of myself and so I know, you wouldn’t want to live your life as someone else would advise you to.
We have been nurtured by such a society, where we have learnt to expect very high of ourselves too soon. Being ambitious is the only way around life – our whole education system, social media, television, radio and newspapers only teach us to dream of being something untouchable in the future. We are what our mind tends to perceive of the real world. Human life has become a television screen, controlled by a remote system of ego, pride, hypocrisy, culture, a filthy system of society and education.
We spend our efforts whole life in the direction of achieving something, whether it is money, love or something else: we are always in a strange pursuit. But have you ever asked to yourself, what are you going to do after all of these achievements? I have seen hundreds of people who have enough money that can buy them anything and everything they want but they never claim that they are very happy in life and they are mostly confused about the meaning of success. To be human means to have consciousness. To be a human in itself means that your life is meaningful and important: even when you are not hyper-productive. Life itself has no goal, life itself is not supposed to come in a package with ambition and mission.
I am not here for a lecture on philosophy, really; but look at life this moment: with great intensity, try to feel everything around with your consciousness. Change is the only constant and that is the rule of the universe. We always seek comfort in life, wish things to be good all the time but change is the consequence of time; it needs no conscious effort. I feel like a great transformation is on your way, you are not born to repeat the same things millions of people have already done, transformation is how you pursue the purpose of your life. You are not someone who lives for yesterday or tomorrow, but lives in the divine energy of present moment.
I know it must be hard living in a whole another country rather than the one you have grown up in and identify with. We have always been taught to fancy the lives in another country, foreign people and foreign land with an amazing opportunity waiting for us, waiting for us to come out of our cocoons and spread our wings and fly. But we are seldom taught about the distress of the first flight. Sometimes, we are not living in reality but swimming in a fantasy of a habitual dream; we tend to project our desires to the future but fail to realize – if you can’t make this moment of your life blissful and happy, how can you make your future, the next moment happy?
I wouldn’t ever say don’t worry about money in life but then don’t make money the center of your worries in life. If we wish to be happy with our lives, we should rather have experiences and learn from them. They help us gain a level of consciousness, while money blinds you from all the pleasures that life has to offer. We need to learn how to focus our attention to things that actually matter to us in the long run: it’s a sensitive balance. Once you learn to balance out your priorities in life, everything that you need will follow. In fact, everything you need is right there, waiting for you to reach out.
Write a journal: everyday, write of at least one thing that you are grateful for. In the long run, you will start realizing what are the things that you really care about, the things that you really value in life. That is how you slowly get to know yourself better. So many times, we are thinking of ourselves only as an idea inside of our heads but our soul is searching for something else.
Dear Vidhya, life is a limitless opportunity, you can extremely go crazy for this world or you simply start by trying to understand the whole process and essence of life, be a witness of everything that goes around you; Inhale and process what goes around, that shall help you be more mindful and conscious of your thought process.
We are always stuck in a question: what can I get from life? But the real question is how you can contribute to life. You reap what you sow. Most of the time, life expects you to be patient and full of love and compassion – life is not always about being materialistic and dreaming about living like what we see on television and social media.
I too, used to be an ambitious person who had fancy dreams in my life. I tried to bring all my effort to go somewhere and earn lots of money. Later I realized that first, I have to learn to accept myself for who I am and respect where I came from, respect my roots and live my life right from where I am currently in life, not from a projected future time. We all have our own independent journey, we will figure out what to do eventually if we accept and live in tune with the ebb and flows of life.
I am not asking you to lose all your ambitions but first, learn what kinds of ambitions would make you happy in a long term. Impressing people with your fancy lifestyle is not what eventually feeds your soul and brings you eternal satisfaction. Sometimes, without realizing, we make our ambitions and thought process work against our happiness.
Nothing you dream of happens for sure, you will have thousands of plans that will not succeed in life but there will be one that will come true, that is your true calling. No matter how old you are, the moment you start walking the path of consciousness, you are born again. The moment you start appreciating the beauty of what lies around you, you will understand how the happiest people on earth are not the one who has got all the riches but the ones who know themselves inside and out, know how to make conscious choices in life.
Learn to enjoy living alone, it helps you to get to know yourself better. Learn to be close to nature, sky, air, trees and water. You will learn what information and guidance from the outer world will help you get better at life. The modern society is flooded with information you absolutely don’t need, learn what you want to feed your soul with. For some time, disconnect yourself from all this teaching and world because life itself is the perfect master; learn to listen to life – and take the guidance of life. Then you’ll know what your calling is.
When you get to know the inner you and get in alignment with your soul, you will start to feel a certain guidance from mystics – living a conscious life is a process and nothing ever happens overnight, healing yourself from the wounds and trauma you have had to go through life is not a beautiful process where you sleep in a bed of flowers. It gets ugly, you find yourself awake and wandering in the middle of the night but at the end, everything is worth it.
Learn how to meditate, consciously ignore whatever is happening in the world that doesn’t serve you, live through and learn how to validate your emotions. Let yourself feel what you are feeling, express it with some sort of art that’s close to your heart. Living consciously helps you bring light in your being.
Life is meaningful if you learn how to swim and surf along the waves. You can be one of those people who find the rhythm of life and will live in peace and harmony, not among those who go offbeat create this world a madhouse for themselves. If you want to encounter the essence of life, stop looking outside and start looking inside.
Free yourself from all kind of prejudices; do not waste your valuable time and energy in trying to become someone who you are not. Take time off your busy life for yourself; treat yourself with your favorite dish when you have the time, treat yourself like you would treat someone who you really really love. That way, you will get a chance to celebrate yourself and what you have made of your life. Make your life a poetry you’d enjoy, the power to change is right there, in your hands.
Do some homework on yourself and life itself will find some path for you, let life plan for you, let life be the host, let yourself be a gracious guest of your life. Life always and every day brings surprise and amusement, be capable enough to recognize, understand and receive the gift of life. With patience and integrity, everything is possible.
Words and advice are the only things I can offer, dear Vidhya. You will definitely realize the path that you need to choose for your happiness when the divine timing is right, with the transformation that follows – You make choices, you choose paths you want to walk and what life brings out of your choices is what belongs to you, you are the one who has to live with it; so please make wise decisions for yourself.
You are beyond materialistic things, you are not a body with a soul but you are a soul in a body; you are energy, you are your presence, you are the love and compassion you offer to life.